As I was scrolling through my Facebook feed, I came across the image above saying how it helps one’s anger cool down if s/he ignores talking about it in 48 hours. As they say, when you are driven by your emotions, you will most likely say the wrong words, do things impulsively, and make the wrong decisions.
I, then, reflected on how I deal with my temper. I laughed and told myself, “Ha! I wish my temper could extend that long.” I consider myself as a very patient person. I would like to believe that those who know me agree (I hope so). Most of the time when I am mad, I usually do not talk and be silent for around a maximum of 10 minutes and after that, I talk to the person right away and change the subject.
I asked myself why and dug deep. Maybe because I am a person who dislikes both disagreements and holding grudges against others. I always (as much as possible) extend my utmost understanding and reflect on the situation – is it worth my time and energy being mad?
The downside of which – it makes me gullible (I know, I know) – I keep getting that – it is being taken advantage of. And while I am okay with it, I always forgive myself for being unapologetically forgiving despite being taken that way.
However, I put an end to it when I know it is already too much. Too much that it hurts, that it brings-me-to-tears kind of anger, that it has totally torn my trust and patience apart. In reality, I did end a friendship to 2 of my former friends who I considered really close to me but betrayed me (and my other friends) when I never thought they would. Not spilling any details about it but having the friendship over gave healing.
Going back to the 48-hour cooling down or maybe for you, it’s less or more – do give time to cool down and let your anger go! Distancing yourself away from someone or something that made you angry brings peace. Believe me, it’s true when they say, “Don’t speak when you’re angry. You can never take back words said in anger.”
Time check: it’s 12:48 AM and I am not sleepy yet. My surrounding is so quiet, lights are off, and everyone is asleep.
At this hour, I am thinking about the way I lived my life before this health crisis entered the scene. I wonder if I have lived it worthwhile or did I neglect the things I needed to be grateful for.
I realized that no matter how I thought I was doing good with my life, I fall short of too many things. I have not been productive enough, I was not the person I envisioned myself to be five years ago, I have not been very appreciative and thankful for the things that come my way, and I am not contributing enough to the society.
And I need to change it NOW.
This Covid-19 pandemic really has its own wonders of making people realize what we have been doing wrong when everything was normal.
Almost giving up. But when I give up, what will it cost?
Today, in the midst of uncertainty, God asks me, “What are you here for?” I was hesitant to answer. I am honestly not as strong as everyone else. I try not to take in and absorb any harsh, sarcastic words of falling short of my part – which already increases my anxiety. In effect, I wanted to distant myself from everyone as I thought my time and effort to are of no use.
However, as I am trying to sleep tonight, God spoke to me and He is saying that all of this is temporary. It is only Him who knows when this will end and that something better will take its place. He reminded me today that a lot of people did not give up yet – the frontliners.
God tells me that at this time, the more I am needed. If I allow myself to quit and allow all fear and negativity sink in, it will last forever – it will remind me for a lifetime how giving up costs much more.
Let us all do our part, pray, and work together to fight this virus.
I always thought that goodbyes are sad, tough, and really hard to do. I have encountered some goodbyes in the past and none of them seemed to be so exciting and fulfilling. But, in this phase in my life, I have never felt so excited to exit from something I have been longing to leave. Not that I am not grateful for being a part of it but having had the courage for letting go of something worthwhile to achieve better horizons and experience new opportunities… is the most satisfying kind of goodbye.